Hello friends!

This past month has been a whirlwind of adjustments for our family. All my children are now back in in-person school four days a week! My introverted and creative soul has been revived by the wonderfully quiet hours between 9:30 and 1:30.

Two weeks ago, I was at a vaccine clinic at our local university’s basketball stadium getting my second dose of the Pfizer Covid-19 vaccine (for which I’m so grateful!) . After waiting the requested 15 minutes after my shot, I got out of my seat to leave. I was looking down at my phone and forgot that there was a big step down into the aisle of stadium seating. I put my full weight on air and before I knew what was happening, my elbow and the right side of my body had slammed into the arm of the chair on the opposite side of the aisle, to the collective gasps of the people around me.

Note: I did not drop my phone.

In the end, I walked away with bruised pride and one broken rib, both of which will heal with time and gentleness. Two weeks out now, I am feeling much better and my pride is recovered enough that I can tell you this story without shame. 😂

May is Mental Health Awareness Month, so I wanted to share in this “all good things” post some books that have helped me. I am no expert on the complexities of mental health, but I do have to work at being mentally and emotionally healthy. Some of my struggles are genetic, chemical, and seasonal, and others are more to do with how I deal with my emotions.

I would guess that all of us need healing and growth in some area. An integral part of our discipleship, of learning to follow Jesus, is learning how to “feel and deal.” as my counselor says. Pastor Peter Scazzero writes in the book The Emotionally Healthy Church (linked below), “It is not possible for a Christian to be spiritually mature while remaining emotionally immature.”

God has brought healing in my life over the last few years through counseling, through conversations with friends who are also growing, and through some great books, which I’ll share below.

My favorite books on mental/emotional health

Try Softer: A Fresh Approach to Move Us out of Anxiety, Stress, and Survival Mode–and into a Life of Connection and Joy* by Aundi Kolber

Kolber is a license professional counselor and her book is full of practical help for dealing with emotions and finding healing from trauma (big and small). She also explains how our brains our wired, how trauma affects the brain, and how God designed our brains to heal. She is a Christian and integrates both a Biblical and scientific approach. Helpful tidbit: be as gentle with yourself as God is with you.

Changes That Heal: Four Practical Steps to a Happier, Healthier You* by Henry Cloud

I have just about finished this one and found it’s a great primer on emotional health. It includes a section on boundaries (dealt with at greater length in the book below), bonding, accepting the good and bad in life, and becoming a mature adult. Helpful tidbit: “negative feelings will not kill you, but avoiding them may.”

Boundaries Updated and Expanded Edition: When to Say Yes, How to Say No To Take Control of Your Life*
by Henry Cloud and John Townsend

I found that learning about boundaries is important in understanding both the limits and responsibilities of your personhood so that you carry the burden God has called you to bear, but not what is not yours to bear. Helpful tidbit: “To rescue people from the natural consequences of their behavior is to render them powerless.”

The Emotionally Healthy Church, Updated and Expanded Edition: A Strategy for Discipleship That Actually Changes Lives*
by Peter Scazzero and Warren Bird

I think this book is especially helpful if you’re in ministry in any way. Scazzero argues that emotional health is the missing link in discipleship. He is the pastor of a diverse church, New Life Fellowship in Queens, New York. Helpful tidbit: emotionally healthy people minister out of who they are, not what they do.

Running Scared: Fear, Worry, and the God of Rest by Edward T. Welch

This is one of the first books I read on anxiety, and it helped me to recognize the way anxiety was functioning in my life. Helpful tidbit: anxiety is always pushing you to go faster, which keeps you from slowing down and examining the source of your anxiety.

It’s Not Always Depression: Working the Change Triangle to Listen to the Body, Discover Core Emotions, and Connect to Your Authentic Self by Hilary Jacobs Hendel.

This is the only book on the list not written from a Christian perspective. Hendel is a psychotherapist and teaches readers how their emotions function and how to feel and deal with them. What I found most helpful is her “change triangle,” and the concept of core and inhibitory emotions. I’ve even explained these concepts to my older kids. Helpful tidbit: anxiety is not an emotion, it’s a reaction to a core emotion.

One book I keep hearing good things about, but haven’t read is The Soul of Shame: Retelling the Stories We Believe About Ourselves* by Curt Thompson. Have any of you read this one? What books do you recommend for mental health?

I have found this inner work especially helpful in parenting. I have been talking to my six-year-old about shame and helping him recognize it in himself. I tell him, “Shame is that feeling not just that you did something bad, but that you are a bad person who is now not worthy of being loved.” The other day, we were talking about a situation where someone felt really bad about themselves, and he said, “I think he was feeling shame, mom.” 😲

Giving ourselves and our children the language to talk about our internal emotional selves can be so empowering. For our children, it can become an opportunity to share with them how God is the great counselor who meets them in their darkest feelings with His comfort, forgiveness, mercy, grace, and compassion.

If you’re struggling with your emotions, I hope you find hope and help. Life is so hard, but God wired us for healing and survival. Today may be dark, but hope can break through at any time. You are precious and loved by God, and worthy of all gentleness, mercy, and compassion. And you are not alone.

If you’re looking for a counselor, there is a collection of resources and databases at the bottom of this page HERE.

COPYRIGHT/USAGE: All writing, artwork and photos are copyright Marydean Draws. Please do not repost or resell on another website. I’m happy for you to use my coloring pages and other printables for home, school, and ministry. If you share content, please link back to the original post. Thank you!

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all good things books mental health